This past week, I got a glimpse of hope for two families who were visiting the prison that I work at. For privacy reasons, I will not be sharing many details. However, I will share some basic things because I believe others need to see this glimpse.
Recently, there was the initial trial for an Inmate concerning a serious crime he had committed against another while in prison. The two families, the one of the accused and the one of the victim, were at the proceedings. From what I understand from my conversations with others, their interactions with each other in the courtroom was anything but cordial. In fact, the impression that I got was that it was pretty hostile.
Not long after the Inmate who had been arraigned returned, it was time to start processing the second session of visitors. As we were doing so, in walk two ladies who said something about being followed. I looked up perplexed, but then in walked two Sherriff’s Deputies, who immediately started talking with one the two ladies. A few moments later, another group of adults came in and I felt the tension rise very, very quickly. As the two groups talked, one Deputy stayed between the two groups, the other moved away to the side
the two groups were obviously struggling to keep things civil. And, I think I was not the only prison who thought things were going to "come to blows." Both Deputies were obviously tense, and I think most other visitors were getting nervous.
But then, something amazing happened. One woman said that she understands that the other woman was feeling deep loss and pain because... Then, the other woman acknowledged the pain that the other woman must be feeling. Though I sensed that these words were a little forced, I still got the sense that they were trying to be genuine and sincere. After this, my coworker started directing each group with what they could do as far as visiting went. The two groups then began to go their separate ways and the tension started to slowly ease.
From my experiences in ministry and with corrections, I know that both families will have a long, difficult journey ahead. Especially since the trial is just getting started. But, the impression that I got was that the two families were taking baby steps towards healing. In such an environment in which it happened, I definitely do feel that it was a miracle of God in progress, that He was slowly helping them with the healing process.
When a loved one is seriously hurt, betrayed, or even killed by someone else, often feels shock, confusion, and even rage. It is very easy for us to allow the pain, anger, loss, etc., to become bitterness. It is much harder to give the pain and anger to God and allow Him to help us forgive.
We cannot confuse forgiving others from allowing a Court of Law to hold other accountable for their actions. Forgiving them means that we allow God to take care of things, and that we let go of our need for revenge.
All of us have suffered pain from others. At times, we hold onto our own anger against ourselves because of things that we either did or failed to do. That is a part of life. The Good News is that Christ can bring healing and forgiveness into our lives. It might be a long and rocky road. But, I believe that it is worth it.
