References:
- Psalm 37:1-10 NAS
- Mark 5:1-20 NAS
- Luke 10:38-42 NAS
The other night I was at the regular Wednesday night Bible Study. I and my co-teacher were ready to teach. But, the few people that usually attend the Gospel of John study that we do were not there. So, we decided to attend another group that was studying Romans. I was expecting a really good discussion. I ended up being a bit disappointed.
The man who was leading the Bible Study started things off with having a couple of volunteers come up and share their personal testimonies. If you are unfamiliar with what that is, a 'personal testimony' is when a person shares how God has changed a his or her life. In some Christian circles, the can mean any time that God has done something to significantly impact how a person lives, how they view life, how they relate to others, etc. This can be something really big, like a 'Road to Damascus' experience. Or, it could be something small, like reading a familiar Scripture passage and God points something new out to you. For others, it either means a 'Road to Damascus' experience (aka 'conversion experience') or God doing something major in your life. Like deliverance from drugs, bring someone out of a self-destructive lifestyle, or something else that is “incredible.” Personally, I fall into the first group.
After the volunteers talked about how they had 'come to know Christ,' the Bible Study leader had us read the Mark 5 passage noted above. His emphasis was how Jesus directed the person that He had delivered from demonic possession to not stay with Him, but to tell his friends and family all that God had done. He then tied this in to how we need to be willing to share our 'personal testimony' with others and to encourage people to 'make a decision for Christ.' This did not make me real comfortable for a number of reasons. The primary one being that sometimes it is more important to 'be Christ' to others instead of just 'telling them about Him.' So, I shared how God has used me on many occasions to help those who were burdened with something. In some of those conversations, I shared what God has done in my life. However, in many of them, I simply listened and empathized with what they were feeling. That is, I listened to how a situation had impacted their lives and tried to understand how that made them feel.
Though I did more of a 'story telling' instead of summarizing, I was hoping that I got my point across. While it is always important to be able to share with others what we believe as Christians and the hope that Christ gives us, sometimes that is not what is most important. I could be wrong, but it seemed that the person leading the study didn't really like my observation. He acknowledged it, but seemed to be very dismissive of it. It could be he was so focused on what he was wanting to teach that he wanted to get back on track. I don't know.
I do know that some Christian denominations have a very, very strong emphasis on 'soul harvesting.' That is, the members of some denominations focus their energies on going out into their communities, telling other people about how God has changed their lives, and to encourage people to 'make a decision' on becoming a Christian. Although I do believe that sharing your testimony is important, and that there will come a time when each of us have to 'make a decision (for follow Christ),' I do not believe that should be the main emphasis.
I also know of some denominations that focus so much on 'social justice' and reaching out to people that they leave out how God came into this world as Jesus to save us from our sins. They focus on serving and helping others, but at the expense of telling others about the life changing message of Jesus Christ. People are helped, but not changed.
I believe that both have to be done. We need to do both, 'be the Gospel' to others and to 'share the Gospel' with others. But, before we can effectively do either, we have to know who God is, we need to be deeply changed by Jesus. That is why I included the other two Scripture passages. We need to spend time studying God's Word on our own, attending worship services where we can be challenged to grow in our faith, and spend time with fellow Christians to encourage each other in our spiritual growth. We need to purposely take time and 'be still,' as the Psalms passage emphasizes. Just like we cannot hear what a friend or co-worker says to us if we are not paying attention, we can't hear God speak to us if we do not take time to be still and listen.
As the Luke passage points out, there are times when we allow ourselves to become too busy with things in life. Martha was so focused on taking care of all the food and other hosting requirements that she was missing out on actually being nourished on what Jesus had to say. Mary, on the other hand, was being still and soaking it all up. When Martha became upset about it, Jesus corrected her. Though it is important to do things and help others, we also need to 'just be still' like Mary was doing.
I have been a follower of Christ since early 1994. There have been seasons in my life where things have been joyful and fun, and seasons where I have struggled with staying positive, doing the right thing, etc. During those times of difficulty, God has always ministered to me. Sometimes it was while having my 'quiet time.' But, many times it has been because God used someone to walk with me during my times of difficulty and shared the burdens that I had.
In my many years of walking with Christ, I have found that God most often uses me to be His presence in another person's life. Not sharing how God has turned my life around and/or up-side-down. Not the need to face the fact that all of us are sinners and are in desperate need to find salvation in Christ alone. Not the 'you have to make a decision.' No… I find that God most often uses me to listen to what is going on in a person's life and to walk with them. So many people have been turned off by the 'in your face' of some people that, if you start telling them about God, they will immediate start shutting down. In that case, no matter how eloquent of a speaker you might be, they will not hear you.
I have found that, most of the time, people are wanting a physical person to help them with what is bothering them. To most people, God is a foreign concept, or something that they have grown to hate because of one reason or another. For them to be able to know that God really does love them and wants to redeem them from their life of sin, we have to be there for them. We have to be willing to listen to them share their ugliness, their pain, their questions. And there will be times where it may take months, even years of listening and loving someone before they will be willing to really listen to you about how God has changed your life.
It really boils down to 'walking the walk' before we 'talk the talk.' If we do not allow God to show His love through us in our actions, then all of our knowledge of Scripture and eloquent speech will be for nothing. If people do not see Christ in our lives, they won't believe what we say about Him. As His ambassadors to this world, we have to intimately know who He is and allow Him to deeply impact our lives. If we do not allow God to change us, we will still resemble this world. If we are not changed ourselves, how can we expect others to want to know Christ?
It is never easy to “walk the walk.” Change can be difficult. But yet, if we genuinely seek God's help in changing, He will do so. It may be painful at times, but God will help us get through it and be better followers. Are we willing to do so?
Saturday, November 7, 2015
Saturday, October 17, 2015
An Amish Murder Critique
References:
- An Amish Murder
- 2 Corinthians 5:11-21 NAS
The other day, I watched a very interesting movie on Netflix called, "An Amish Murder." In a nutshell, a young lady grows up in the Amish community, a traumatic event happens in her life, and she leaves the Amish community to pursue a career in Law Enforcement. Years later, after making detective, she returns to a small town in Ohio near where she grew up as the police chief. While she is home, a series of murders take place. These murders are eerily like the ones that were committed when she was growing up.
One of the reasons why I enjoyed the movie was because it was a very good thriller. Throughout the movie, one thinks that the serial killer might be one person. Then, maybe someone else. The end is a bit of a surprise. I always enjoy movies like that because it challenges me to be observant of the facts. Most thriller movies like this one will have the clues needed to make the right connection at the end. It's just that many of them are very subtle. At least for me, it's a fun game to see if I can guess correctly. With this movie, I have to admit, I almost didn't catch on to who the real culprit was until near the end.
Having been a military analyst and currently being a MP (Military Policeman), I enjoy a good crime thriller at times. It was also good in that two of the main characters were wrestling with different traumatic events in their lives. Different but similar enough that they were able to relate and help each other. At least to me, that gave it a more interesting and human twist. How many of us have experienced major difficulties, even a traumatic event, and then the growth and healing that we experienced was then used to help someone else? I know that God has used difficulties that I've experience to be a blessing to others. There has also been times where God used lessons that I learned while not dealing with a situation well to help someone else facing a similar situation. Although it was extremely painful to deal with at the time, seeing how God has helped others always gives me a good feeling.
Something else that I really appreciated about this movie was the theme of being an ambassador between two very different cultures. As I have mentioned several other times in my blog, I have had the opportunity to interact with people from all over the world. Most of my experiences have been in Europe and Iraq. But, I have gotten to know people from many other cultures, too. There have been times when I did not represent myself well to others. We all do that. Over the years, I have made it a point to learn from my mistakes and to better understand the cultural background of others.
Because of the lessons that I have learned over the years, I am typically able to interact with those from a foreign country. This is not always easy. There are things that some cultures do on a daily basis (or don't do) that many Americans find offensive. An example that comes to my mind has to do with deodorant. I had several friends in seminary who were from Africa. Both of these men had good hygiene habits, but neither of them used deodorant. Because of this, they both had bo (body odor). In my conversations with fellow students, I found out that many of them found this annoying or even extremely aggravating. I'm not sure if any of them talked with these two individuals or not. But, they were definitely vocal about it to fellow students.
Although I wasn't happy about their bo, I did understand that in their home country, deodorant wasn't often used. So I accepted them as they were. Something interesting, though, was that I noticed that both men had a unique scent. This made for a few amusing situations when one of them approached me and I was able to correctly identify who it was without looking.
When I was working in Iraq in 2010-11, I was interacting with people from all over the world. Not just Iraqi government officials and Iraqi military personnel, but business people from Iraq and many countries all over the world. Each of them had their own cultures. I was able to do my job well because I strove to treat each person that came into my office with respect as a person and to their native culture. This enabled me to not only get my job done effectively, but it also helped to foster positive relationships between the US Army and those who did business or worked for other governments. Several people were so touched by how I did my best to respect their cultures that they asked to work with me or even gave me unique gifts from their business or embassy.
To touch on the Scripture passage from 2nd Corinthians, that is what God calls us to do to everyone around us. God calls each of us to be His representative to others in this world. The Greek word that Paul uses in Galatians 6:20 and the 2nd Corinthians passage is προσβευο (pres-byoo'-o), which means: 1. to be older, prior by birth or in age, or 2. to be an ambassador, act as an ambassador. It is used only twice in the New Testament, with both being the second definition. But, how can we do this?
An ambassador must be highly knowledgeable of two different cultures and (often times also languages). Of course, he has to fully understand his native culture and language. That is a given. But, the ambassador must also be highly knowledgeable of the culture and language of the country that he is living in. He or she must understand both extremely well so that they can effectively translate what his or her native country wants to something that the host country can understand. And, since some things that are acceptable in country may be extremely offensive in another one, he or she needs to keep this in mind as they work with their host country in understanding what their native country wants.
When we become a Christian, our new residency is now in Heaven with God, though we still live in this world. As we grow as a Christian, we need to learn as much as we can about who God is and what He expects of us and Followers of Christ. As we learn more about our adopted homeland (Heaven) God expects us to tell others of this world about Him. To do so, we have to understand the language and culture that we live in. That is often a given, having grown up in a particular state or town and, now as a Christian, teaching others about Christ. However, God often guides us to someplace new. When this happens, we have to learn about the new culture, traditions, and language. Because of regional slang being different throughout any country, there are things that one always has to learn that are unique to that area.
Each of us has become a Christian because God used someone to introduce us to Christ. God has also used many people and circumstances in our lives to teach us more about Him. Some people sought to purposely direct us towards Christ. Others sought to do evil to us, but God used the circumstances to bring about His good will. As followers of Christ, God expects us to direct others to Him. He wants us to be His ambassadors to this fallen world so that others can receive His salvation. That requires us to not only understand His Word (the Bible), but to understand those with whom we interact with, as well as seek to teach others about God. All of this requires time and effort.
I have seen all to often people visiting a foreign country and, either because they lacked interest in learning about another culture or arrogance that their culture was superior, they caused friction, ill will, or even caused severe problems. And, that particular person or group of people may not have suffered the consequences of their laziness or arrogance, but someone who was totally innocent of the previous event. There have been a few times during my travels that people have not wanted to be respectful towards me because of what others have done. Sometimes my actions and attitude help them change their minds towards Americans or towards Christians. But, that isn't always the case. Should we not strive to be the best representative of God to the world? Should we not live in such a way that others will want to know Christ as we have come to know Him?
- An Amish Murder
- 2 Corinthians 5:11-21 NAS
The other day, I watched a very interesting movie on Netflix called, "An Amish Murder." In a nutshell, a young lady grows up in the Amish community, a traumatic event happens in her life, and she leaves the Amish community to pursue a career in Law Enforcement. Years later, after making detective, she returns to a small town in Ohio near where she grew up as the police chief. While she is home, a series of murders take place. These murders are eerily like the ones that were committed when she was growing up.
One of the reasons why I enjoyed the movie was because it was a very good thriller. Throughout the movie, one thinks that the serial killer might be one person. Then, maybe someone else. The end is a bit of a surprise. I always enjoy movies like that because it challenges me to be observant of the facts. Most thriller movies like this one will have the clues needed to make the right connection at the end. It's just that many of them are very subtle. At least for me, it's a fun game to see if I can guess correctly. With this movie, I have to admit, I almost didn't catch on to who the real culprit was until near the end.
Having been a military analyst and currently being a MP (Military Policeman), I enjoy a good crime thriller at times. It was also good in that two of the main characters were wrestling with different traumatic events in their lives. Different but similar enough that they were able to relate and help each other. At least to me, that gave it a more interesting and human twist. How many of us have experienced major difficulties, even a traumatic event, and then the growth and healing that we experienced was then used to help someone else? I know that God has used difficulties that I've experience to be a blessing to others. There has also been times where God used lessons that I learned while not dealing with a situation well to help someone else facing a similar situation. Although it was extremely painful to deal with at the time, seeing how God has helped others always gives me a good feeling.
Something else that I really appreciated about this movie was the theme of being an ambassador between two very different cultures. As I have mentioned several other times in my blog, I have had the opportunity to interact with people from all over the world. Most of my experiences have been in Europe and Iraq. But, I have gotten to know people from many other cultures, too. There have been times when I did not represent myself well to others. We all do that. Over the years, I have made it a point to learn from my mistakes and to better understand the cultural background of others.
Because of the lessons that I have learned over the years, I am typically able to interact with those from a foreign country. This is not always easy. There are things that some cultures do on a daily basis (or don't do) that many Americans find offensive. An example that comes to my mind has to do with deodorant. I had several friends in seminary who were from Africa. Both of these men had good hygiene habits, but neither of them used deodorant. Because of this, they both had bo (body odor). In my conversations with fellow students, I found out that many of them found this annoying or even extremely aggravating. I'm not sure if any of them talked with these two individuals or not. But, they were definitely vocal about it to fellow students.
Although I wasn't happy about their bo, I did understand that in their home country, deodorant wasn't often used. So I accepted them as they were. Something interesting, though, was that I noticed that both men had a unique scent. This made for a few amusing situations when one of them approached me and I was able to correctly identify who it was without looking.
When I was working in Iraq in 2010-11, I was interacting with people from all over the world. Not just Iraqi government officials and Iraqi military personnel, but business people from Iraq and many countries all over the world. Each of them had their own cultures. I was able to do my job well because I strove to treat each person that came into my office with respect as a person and to their native culture. This enabled me to not only get my job done effectively, but it also helped to foster positive relationships between the US Army and those who did business or worked for other governments. Several people were so touched by how I did my best to respect their cultures that they asked to work with me or even gave me unique gifts from their business or embassy.
To touch on the Scripture passage from 2nd Corinthians, that is what God calls us to do to everyone around us. God calls each of us to be His representative to others in this world. The Greek word that Paul uses in Galatians 6:20 and the 2nd Corinthians passage is προσβευο (pres-byoo'-o), which means: 1. to be older, prior by birth or in age, or 2. to be an ambassador, act as an ambassador. It is used only twice in the New Testament, with both being the second definition. But, how can we do this?
An ambassador must be highly knowledgeable of two different cultures and (often times also languages). Of course, he has to fully understand his native culture and language. That is a given. But, the ambassador must also be highly knowledgeable of the culture and language of the country that he is living in. He or she must understand both extremely well so that they can effectively translate what his or her native country wants to something that the host country can understand. And, since some things that are acceptable in country may be extremely offensive in another one, he or she needs to keep this in mind as they work with their host country in understanding what their native country wants.
When we become a Christian, our new residency is now in Heaven with God, though we still live in this world. As we grow as a Christian, we need to learn as much as we can about who God is and what He expects of us and Followers of Christ. As we learn more about our adopted homeland (Heaven) God expects us to tell others of this world about Him. To do so, we have to understand the language and culture that we live in. That is often a given, having grown up in a particular state or town and, now as a Christian, teaching others about Christ. However, God often guides us to someplace new. When this happens, we have to learn about the new culture, traditions, and language. Because of regional slang being different throughout any country, there are things that one always has to learn that are unique to that area.
Each of us has become a Christian because God used someone to introduce us to Christ. God has also used many people and circumstances in our lives to teach us more about Him. Some people sought to purposely direct us towards Christ. Others sought to do evil to us, but God used the circumstances to bring about His good will. As followers of Christ, God expects us to direct others to Him. He wants us to be His ambassadors to this fallen world so that others can receive His salvation. That requires us to not only understand His Word (the Bible), but to understand those with whom we interact with, as well as seek to teach others about God. All of this requires time and effort.
I have seen all to often people visiting a foreign country and, either because they lacked interest in learning about another culture or arrogance that their culture was superior, they caused friction, ill will, or even caused severe problems. And, that particular person or group of people may not have suffered the consequences of their laziness or arrogance, but someone who was totally innocent of the previous event. There have been a few times during my travels that people have not wanted to be respectful towards me because of what others have done. Sometimes my actions and attitude help them change their minds towards Americans or towards Christians. But, that isn't always the case. Should we not strive to be the best representative of God to the world? Should we not live in such a way that others will want to know Christ as we have come to know Him?
Friday, October 16, 2015
Reflections on 16 October 2015
I know that it has been a while since I posted an entry here. Things have been very busy for me for the last week or so. But, since I have some down time, I thought that I would write some reflections. And, just so you know, I am writing this on my phone. So, if things seem oddly organized or grammar is poor, that is probably why.
One of my biggest challenges is getting the right balance of personal time for reflecting and recharging, and still getting the socializing that I need. Throw in the responsibilities of being a supervisor and you have quite a balanxing act. There are days where I feel recharged enough that I can face the challengea of life. Other times I feel so drained that anything social is a challenge. And, there are times where I don't have the luxury of recharging, I just have to "suck it up and drive on." So challenging!
Spiritual warfare ia very real. The closer one walks with God and the more you strive to be obedient to Him, the more you should expect spiritual attacks. I have been walking with Christ since January of 1994. You would think that I would not easily get "spiritually ambushed." But, there arw times that I do. But, even when that does happen, my response is typically to return to even more feaverent of prayer.
In the last few weeks, I have been engaged in some very intense spiritual warfare. Between praying for my Chain of Command, the people who persecute the Body of Christ (especially nations that so ao harahly), my family, and several people who arw facing great difficulties, I have received a great deal of "feedback." And not the positive kind.
In fact, a few weeks ago, I couldn't sleep so I did some intense praying. Not too long after I started, I started feel a real heaviness on me. The more I prayed, the worse it got. It got so bad that I started to shake. So, I asked other prayer warriors to pray for me. It seemed that I had really stirred the hornets' nest. And, it worked. Soon after that, I was able to fall back to sleep.
Been enjoying the Bible Study I and another NCO have been doing. I find it so fascinating that the Gospel of John has such simple language, but yet is so deep in the theology! I have joked on several ocassions that I could spend two or maybe even three week on each chapter! They arw just that rich in theology! The dialogue during the studies have been very exciting and informative. I've pointed out a lot of things that others had not noticed before, and others have shared insights that I had not noticed. Such an awesome experience!
I found a very helpful website called "introvertdear.com." I found it about 3 weeks ago and have been reading it regularly ever since. I had ways wondered qhy I reacted to somethings like I have, or why I would feel so utterly drained, even on a good day, when helping others. Things are making more sense now. God hasmade each of us unique. But, certain personalities are more common than others. And, praise God, I have found several INFJ groups on Facebook. It has been so encouraging, talking with others who have had similar experiences.
Life is very challenging. I definitely have been experiencing a lot of stretching in my life. It is both draining and exciting at the same time. I am definitely not the same person I was just a year ago. But, then again, in a year, or even in just a few months, I will be different than I am now. All through out life one should strive to continue to learn and grow as a person. And, as a Christian, one should continously strive to deepen one's walk with Christ.
One other thought before I close this entry. We must always remember that we do not always know what God is doing in our lives and in the lives of those around us. Sometimes God allows us to see glimpses of what He is doing. But, not always. We must walk in faith the God will honor what we do in faith and bring about His perfect will. Just like it takes months or even yeara for a plant to grow, mature, and evwn bare fruit, so it is in our lives. We must patiently wait for Gid to do His will. And, waiting can be so very hard, too. May God help us to do so.
One of my biggest challenges is getting the right balance of personal time for reflecting and recharging, and still getting the socializing that I need. Throw in the responsibilities of being a supervisor and you have quite a balanxing act. There are days where I feel recharged enough that I can face the challengea of life. Other times I feel so drained that anything social is a challenge. And, there are times where I don't have the luxury of recharging, I just have to "suck it up and drive on." So challenging!
Spiritual warfare ia very real. The closer one walks with God and the more you strive to be obedient to Him, the more you should expect spiritual attacks. I have been walking with Christ since January of 1994. You would think that I would not easily get "spiritually ambushed." But, there arw times that I do. But, even when that does happen, my response is typically to return to even more feaverent of prayer.
In the last few weeks, I have been engaged in some very intense spiritual warfare. Between praying for my Chain of Command, the people who persecute the Body of Christ (especially nations that so ao harahly), my family, and several people who arw facing great difficulties, I have received a great deal of "feedback." And not the positive kind.
In fact, a few weeks ago, I couldn't sleep so I did some intense praying. Not too long after I started, I started feel a real heaviness on me. The more I prayed, the worse it got. It got so bad that I started to shake. So, I asked other prayer warriors to pray for me. It seemed that I had really stirred the hornets' nest. And, it worked. Soon after that, I was able to fall back to sleep.
Been enjoying the Bible Study I and another NCO have been doing. I find it so fascinating that the Gospel of John has such simple language, but yet is so deep in the theology! I have joked on several ocassions that I could spend two or maybe even three week on each chapter! They arw just that rich in theology! The dialogue during the studies have been very exciting and informative. I've pointed out a lot of things that others had not noticed before, and others have shared insights that I had not noticed. Such an awesome experience!
I found a very helpful website called "introvertdear.com." I found it about 3 weeks ago and have been reading it regularly ever since. I had ways wondered qhy I reacted to somethings like I have, or why I would feel so utterly drained, even on a good day, when helping others. Things are making more sense now. God hasmade each of us unique. But, certain personalities are more common than others. And, praise God, I have found several INFJ groups on Facebook. It has been so encouraging, talking with others who have had similar experiences.
Life is very challenging. I definitely have been experiencing a lot of stretching in my life. It is both draining and exciting at the same time. I am definitely not the same person I was just a year ago. But, then again, in a year, or even in just a few months, I will be different than I am now. All through out life one should strive to continue to learn and grow as a person. And, as a Christian, one should continously strive to deepen one's walk with Christ.
One other thought before I close this entry. We must always remember that we do not always know what God is doing in our lives and in the lives of those around us. Sometimes God allows us to see glimpses of what He is doing. But, not always. We must walk in faith the God will honor what we do in faith and bring about His perfect will. Just like it takes months or even yeara for a plant to grow, mature, and evwn bare fruit, so it is in our lives. We must patiently wait for Gid to do His will. And, waiting can be so very hard, too. May God help us to do so.
Sunday, October 4, 2015
Living a Lie
References:
- Romans 3:9-20 NAS
- 1 John 1:5-10 NAS
- The Village (2004)
I finished watching a very interesting movie not to long ago called, “The Village (2004).” It was written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan. I know that not everyone out there likes spoilers, so I will try to not tell too much. According to the IMDB page, it is considered to be a mystery, drama and a romance movie. Those descriptions definitely do fit. But, I believe there is a very important theological bent to this movie, too. The theological concept of human kind and human nature.
One of the first things that we learn in the movie is that the members of The Village have a pact or truce of sorts. It seems that there is some sort of intelligent creature living in the woods surrounding the village. The agreement comes to light that, as long as they do not wear 'the bad color' and do not venture into the woods, the creatures will not come into their Village and cause harm. This underlined fear of the creatures in the woods in one of the main themes driving the movie. The fear of these creatures and the evil of 'people in the other towns' keep the members of this community totally isolated from anyone else. In fact, there is a continuous fear that if anyone were to visit one of 'those towns,' it could destroy their 'innocent community.'
Watching the movie, set in 'olde Pennsylvania,' we see what appears to be a genuine utopia. There are no weapons seen at all. One starts to wonder if we are observing an Amish-like culture. There are definitely Judeo Christian values, though nothing really overt. At one point in the movie, a young man who has some sort of mental problems is seen hitting some other boys with a stick in a playful manner, and then they all start wrestling. It is soon broken up and the young boy who was 'playing roughly' with the other kids is threatened with punishment. Although things seem a little odd (at least to me), it's all believable.
Two things soon happen that seem to jeopardize everything. One is that two members of the community venture into the woods. One due to the fact that he lacks understanding, the other who chooses to do so. The other threat to everyone's existence is an 'accident' that happens. Because of a love triangle one person is almost fatally injured. The governing counsel must now decide what to do because of the choices that others have made. And, it turns out, a lot of things are not what they seem.
One of the words that is used a lot during the movie is the term “innocence.” It is the hope that The Village Elders that this status quo of 'innocence' is maintained. They go to great lengths to make sure that people do not violate 'the pact' by crossing the boarder/perimeter. They also make sure that people are living good lives of loving each other and not harming others. Although throughout the first half of the movie, things seem to go well. Though there are jealousies and arguments, there does not seem to be any 'overt sin.' But yet, eventually, we realize that evil is still present and a terrible act (this 'accident') happens. Everyone is affected, and it threatens to destroy everything. People seem to be panicky and at wits end with how to deal with all of the events without showing evil.
All in all, I did enjoy the movie. I knew enough of the plot that I was able to pick up on many of the 'hints' throughout the film. But, it also really got me thinking. How often do we try to play this game? That is, how often do we pretend that we can overcome our own evil, sinful nature through our own strength? Many religions teach this idea. That by self-discipline, one can distance ourselves from our sinful nature so as to not act out on it. Throughout Scripture, we see that we are complete incapable of doing so. Sin will rear its ugly head sooner or later. And, there will be consequences when this happens.
Now, it is important to discipline ourselves. We are called to live our life of obedience to God's Laws. The thing is, Scripture teaches is that it is not by our own strength that we can do this. As Jesus tells the Pharisee Nicodemus, one has to be 'born again' or 'born from above.' (John 3:1-21) It is only when the Holy Spirit dwells within us and seek to let It control our lives that we can live a life pleasing to God. The thing is, we will never be 'perfect' and live a 'sinless life' in this world. We will always struggle with sin. But, in our journey in life, as we seek to let God guide our lives, we can become 'more Christ-like.' The theological term for this is sanctification. A good definition of this word is:
Movies are wonderful for entertainment. And they can be very good tools for teachings important lessons in life. But, it is important that we take the teachings of God's Word as the foundation of our lives. So relax and read a good book or watch a good movie. They can be wonderful entertainment. But, be discerning in what you take in. Let God's Spirit guide each of us as we learn and grow.
- Romans 3:9-20 NAS
- 1 John 1:5-10 NAS
- The Village (2004)
I finished watching a very interesting movie not to long ago called, “The Village (2004).” It was written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan. I know that not everyone out there likes spoilers, so I will try to not tell too much. According to the IMDB page, it is considered to be a mystery, drama and a romance movie. Those descriptions definitely do fit. But, I believe there is a very important theological bent to this movie, too. The theological concept of human kind and human nature.
One of the first things that we learn in the movie is that the members of The Village have a pact or truce of sorts. It seems that there is some sort of intelligent creature living in the woods surrounding the village. The agreement comes to light that, as long as they do not wear 'the bad color' and do not venture into the woods, the creatures will not come into their Village and cause harm. This underlined fear of the creatures in the woods in one of the main themes driving the movie. The fear of these creatures and the evil of 'people in the other towns' keep the members of this community totally isolated from anyone else. In fact, there is a continuous fear that if anyone were to visit one of 'those towns,' it could destroy their 'innocent community.'
Watching the movie, set in 'olde Pennsylvania,' we see what appears to be a genuine utopia. There are no weapons seen at all. One starts to wonder if we are observing an Amish-like culture. There are definitely Judeo Christian values, though nothing really overt. At one point in the movie, a young man who has some sort of mental problems is seen hitting some other boys with a stick in a playful manner, and then they all start wrestling. It is soon broken up and the young boy who was 'playing roughly' with the other kids is threatened with punishment. Although things seem a little odd (at least to me), it's all believable.
Two things soon happen that seem to jeopardize everything. One is that two members of the community venture into the woods. One due to the fact that he lacks understanding, the other who chooses to do so. The other threat to everyone's existence is an 'accident' that happens. Because of a love triangle one person is almost fatally injured. The governing counsel must now decide what to do because of the choices that others have made. And, it turns out, a lot of things are not what they seem.
One of the words that is used a lot during the movie is the term “innocence.” It is the hope that The Village Elders that this status quo of 'innocence' is maintained. They go to great lengths to make sure that people do not violate 'the pact' by crossing the boarder/perimeter. They also make sure that people are living good lives of loving each other and not harming others. Although throughout the first half of the movie, things seem to go well. Though there are jealousies and arguments, there does not seem to be any 'overt sin.' But yet, eventually, we realize that evil is still present and a terrible act (this 'accident') happens. Everyone is affected, and it threatens to destroy everything. People seem to be panicky and at wits end with how to deal with all of the events without showing evil.
All in all, I did enjoy the movie. I knew enough of the plot that I was able to pick up on many of the 'hints' throughout the film. But, it also really got me thinking. How often do we try to play this game? That is, how often do we pretend that we can overcome our own evil, sinful nature through our own strength? Many religions teach this idea. That by self-discipline, one can distance ourselves from our sinful nature so as to not act out on it. Throughout Scripture, we see that we are complete incapable of doing so. Sin will rear its ugly head sooner or later. And, there will be consequences when this happens.
Now, it is important to discipline ourselves. We are called to live our life of obedience to God's Laws. The thing is, Scripture teaches is that it is not by our own strength that we can do this. As Jesus tells the Pharisee Nicodemus, one has to be 'born again' or 'born from above.' (John 3:1-21) It is only when the Holy Spirit dwells within us and seek to let It control our lives that we can live a life pleasing to God. The thing is, we will never be 'perfect' and live a 'sinless life' in this world. We will always struggle with sin. But, in our journey in life, as we seek to let God guide our lives, we can become 'more Christ-like.' The theological term for this is sanctification. A good definition of this word is:
“involves more than a mere moral reformation of character, brought about by the power of the truth: it is the work of the Holy Spirit bringing the whole nature more and more under the influences of the new gracious principles implanted in the soul in regeneration. In other words, sanctification is the carrying on to perfection the work begun in regeneration, and it extends to the whole man”. reference here
Movies are wonderful for entertainment. And they can be very good tools for teachings important lessons in life. But, it is important that we take the teachings of God's Word as the foundation of our lives. So relax and read a good book or watch a good movie. They can be wonderful entertainment. But, be discerning in what you take in. Let God's Spirit guide each of us as we learn and grow.
Sunday, September 20, 2015
Thoughts and Feelings, So Thorough
Thoughts flowing freely, unhindered, carefree;
going this way, that way,
unhindered and free.
Anger and frustration, mine or soaked up?
Now they ease, fade to the distance,
thoughts and feelings are now more clear…
Time passes, not paying attention…
Stresses and frustration, mine or others,
are finally fading away.
Sometimes I go for a long walk.
Sometimes I read, sometimes watch tv.
Sometimes, only in quiet stillness they leave.
Although through the day, talking and interacting,
things build up, they're soaked up.
Now, processed, examined, set free.
Many times I spend long hours
trying to sort through all that I feelings
examining this way and that.
At times I will rehearse conversations,
trying different approaches,
hearing their voices, feeling their mannerisms…
Trying out different ideas, mental role-playing,
knowing their patters, their tendencies…
How to address? Is it worth it?
Seconding guessing all these thoughts,
present plans, future plans…
What will work? Will it all fail?
While walking, while resting, while sleeping or eating,
my thoughts will often wonder
this way, that way, where ever.
From past conversations to future expectations
they are examined, processed
no mental stone left unturned.
Good possibilities, bad possibilities,
all are considered, analyzed.
Which one more? God only knows!
Approached by someone, asked if I have a little time.
A heart hurts, mind is confused,
or a burdened needs to be shared.
Sometimes this is totally expected.
Other times a great surprise.
But helping is my calling, so listen I will.
I listen to their words, spoken or not.
Sense their emotions, even draw them in.
I filter all they share, through heart and mind.
As time goes by, conversation wanes.
They feel calmer, heart is lighter.
Do I have anything wise to say?
Their problems, experiences, sorted and sifted,
and analyzed within my mind.
Thoughts and feelings, mesh with mine.
A thought, an idea, or even my own deeds,
sifted through, maybe shared,
or just gentle quiet of a burden shared.
We part and I continue sifting and sorting,
their thoughts, feelings I felt, even absorbed.
Gradually the mess is made into sense.
Though I rejoice that a life was touched,
God has blessed through me,
I am tired, or even exhausted.
My day is still young, much yet to do.
A silent prayer for guidance, energy, focus;
till I can finally, fully rest.
RC Underwood
20SEP2015
going this way, that way,
unhindered and free.
Anger and frustration, mine or soaked up?
Now they ease, fade to the distance,
thoughts and feelings are now more clear…
Time passes, not paying attention…
Stresses and frustration, mine or others,
are finally fading away.
Sometimes I go for a long walk.
Sometimes I read, sometimes watch tv.
Sometimes, only in quiet stillness they leave.
Although through the day, talking and interacting,
things build up, they're soaked up.
Now, processed, examined, set free.
Many times I spend long hours
trying to sort through all that I feelings
examining this way and that.
At times I will rehearse conversations,
trying different approaches,
hearing their voices, feeling their mannerisms…
Trying out different ideas, mental role-playing,
knowing their patters, their tendencies…
How to address? Is it worth it?
Seconding guessing all these thoughts,
present plans, future plans…
What will work? Will it all fail?
While walking, while resting, while sleeping or eating,
my thoughts will often wonder
this way, that way, where ever.
From past conversations to future expectations
they are examined, processed
no mental stone left unturned.
Good possibilities, bad possibilities,
all are considered, analyzed.
Which one more? God only knows!
Approached by someone, asked if I have a little time.
A heart hurts, mind is confused,
or a burdened needs to be shared.
Sometimes this is totally expected.
Other times a great surprise.
But helping is my calling, so listen I will.
I listen to their words, spoken or not.
Sense their emotions, even draw them in.
I filter all they share, through heart and mind.
As time goes by, conversation wanes.
They feel calmer, heart is lighter.
Do I have anything wise to say?
Their problems, experiences, sorted and sifted,
and analyzed within my mind.
Thoughts and feelings, mesh with mine.
A thought, an idea, or even my own deeds,
sifted through, maybe shared,
or just gentle quiet of a burden shared.
We part and I continue sifting and sorting,
their thoughts, feelings I felt, even absorbed.
Gradually the mess is made into sense.
Though I rejoice that a life was touched,
God has blessed through me,
I am tired, or even exhausted.
My day is still young, much yet to do.
A silent prayer for guidance, energy, focus;
till I can finally, fully rest.
RC Underwood
20SEP2015
Saturday, September 19, 2015
Cultural and Respect
References:
- Acts 17:16-34 NAS
- 1 Corinthians 9:16-27 NAS
- Lawrence of Arabia (1962)
- Kingdom of Heaven (2005)
- The Kingdom (2007)
I love a good, thought provoking movie, as well as a good action movie or a good thriller. For me, the movie has to have depth. I want to be touched by the message of the movie, not just something meaningless to watch. Yes, I am a bit picky about what movies I watch. Each of us has our own preferences. A movie that I have just recently added to my “very much enjoy list” is “Lawrence of Arabia.” This movie has a similar theme to other two movies that I really enjoy, “Kingdom of Heaven” and “The Kingdom.” But, I will get to that in a few minutes.
In the passage from Acts, we see Paul and Silas were traveling together on Paul's second missionary trip (Acts 15:36-41) and were currently in Athens, Greece. Paul sees all sorts of idols, including any empty pedestal, and uses them as a springboard for preaching to the local populace in a manner that they could understand. In the 1 Corinthians passage referenced above, we see Paul's strategy a little more in depth. He seeks to understand the culture that he is working in, and then uses that to inform how he teaches them about Christ. He doesn't change the Message of the Gospel, just how he explains it and how he lives amongst them. He does that so that they can understand who Christ Jesus is.
You see, each of us view life through the lens of our unique blend of culture, heritage, and experiences. All of this informs us how to view life. It's the framework that we use in order to understand the world around us. Not only does each country have its own unique culture, but communities within the same country have different forms of culture. Although a whole nation may share some similar cultural features, different areas within the same country will differ somewhat. Local customs, dialects, and unique histories vary greatly from place to place.
Besides the United States, I have experienced the local cultures of Europe and some parts of Iraq. Through visiting distant relatives in Europe and spending a semester in Strasbourg, France, I have a lot of first hand experience with European cultures. I have been able to see local history, experienced local traditions, and visited with many different people. This personal experience, combined with basic knowledge of the German language and history, has opened many doors for me. Whether traveling on a train, sitting in a restaurant, or some other environment, I have been blessed with some fascinating conversations with German people. There have been awkward times where neither of us had enough vocabulary to express all that we wanted to say. But yet, we strove to understand and to be understood.
My experience with the Iraqi culture is a bit more limited. But, especially during my third deployment in 2010-11, I did get to interact with some of the business, government and military leaders in Baghdad. That was because of my job with creating vehicle security passes for vehicles within the International Zone. Not only did I get to interact with some of the Iraqi citizens, but I also got to interact with many of the members of the different embassies. Although I had many positive experiences working with each of them, one situation in particular really stands out with me.
One of the PSD (Personal Security Detail) teams that I worked with was from the Korean Embassy. While in high school, college, and in seminary, I have gotten to know many people from different Asian countries. Because of these experiences, both good and bad, I had fairly good idea of what I should do. When they came to the door, I stood up, walked towards them, and then bowed to them. I acknowledged them according to their culture. They hesitated a moment, then returned the bow. We then got down to business. For whatever reason, they had to leave and return. When they came back a few days later, they literately stood at the door and politely told the OIC (Officer in Charge) that they would like to talk with me. They then patiently waited for me to be ready. Because of the way I had shown them respect, they went out of their way to show me respect.
Over the years, I have talked with many people from different countries while they were either visiting or studying in the United States. While many people do try to show respect to them, it is unfortunate that others within the US do not. This happens while Americans have traveled to different countries to visit and while foreigners have visited the US. Sometimes it's because someone just does not have any experience with other cultures and doesn't understand the differences. There are so many different cultures out there that it would be impossible to understand them all. And most foreigners visiting or studying here understand that. But, there is a big difference between not understanding because of no experience, and not even trying.
Each of the three movies have a common theme. Major world events caused two different cultures to have to work together. In each of the movies, each side had their cultural stereotypes of the other. These stereotypes caused a lot of friction and frustration initially. But, during the movie, people on both sides made the attempt to try and understand the others' perspective, while seeking to more clearly explaining their own. It took time, patience, and a lot of work. But, by the end of the movie, their work paved the way for a lot of mutual respect and learning. In working together, they were able to accomplish a lot of awesome things. Something they could not have accomplished separately.
There have been many times where, in trying to interact with someone of another culture, I 'put my foot into my mouth.' I have made mistakes. I have also striven to learn from those mistakes so that I can better interact with people from a different culture. It is not easy. What is normal in some cultures can be offensive to others. These are easy to find. However, will we strive to set aside the things that we find distasteful and annoying and seek common ground? That is something each and every one of us will have to decide when the time comes. For those of us who follow Christ, we are His ambassadors to this world. How shall we live this out?
- Acts 17:16-34 NAS
- 1 Corinthians 9:16-27 NAS
- Lawrence of Arabia (1962)
- Kingdom of Heaven (2005)
- The Kingdom (2007)
I love a good, thought provoking movie, as well as a good action movie or a good thriller. For me, the movie has to have depth. I want to be touched by the message of the movie, not just something meaningless to watch. Yes, I am a bit picky about what movies I watch. Each of us has our own preferences. A movie that I have just recently added to my “very much enjoy list” is “Lawrence of Arabia.” This movie has a similar theme to other two movies that I really enjoy, “Kingdom of Heaven” and “The Kingdom.” But, I will get to that in a few minutes.
In the passage from Acts, we see Paul and Silas were traveling together on Paul's second missionary trip (Acts 15:36-41) and were currently in Athens, Greece. Paul sees all sorts of idols, including any empty pedestal, and uses them as a springboard for preaching to the local populace in a manner that they could understand. In the 1 Corinthians passage referenced above, we see Paul's strategy a little more in depth. He seeks to understand the culture that he is working in, and then uses that to inform how he teaches them about Christ. He doesn't change the Message of the Gospel, just how he explains it and how he lives amongst them. He does that so that they can understand who Christ Jesus is.
You see, each of us view life through the lens of our unique blend of culture, heritage, and experiences. All of this informs us how to view life. It's the framework that we use in order to understand the world around us. Not only does each country have its own unique culture, but communities within the same country have different forms of culture. Although a whole nation may share some similar cultural features, different areas within the same country will differ somewhat. Local customs, dialects, and unique histories vary greatly from place to place.
Besides the United States, I have experienced the local cultures of Europe and some parts of Iraq. Through visiting distant relatives in Europe and spending a semester in Strasbourg, France, I have a lot of first hand experience with European cultures. I have been able to see local history, experienced local traditions, and visited with many different people. This personal experience, combined with basic knowledge of the German language and history, has opened many doors for me. Whether traveling on a train, sitting in a restaurant, or some other environment, I have been blessed with some fascinating conversations with German people. There have been awkward times where neither of us had enough vocabulary to express all that we wanted to say. But yet, we strove to understand and to be understood.
My experience with the Iraqi culture is a bit more limited. But, especially during my third deployment in 2010-11, I did get to interact with some of the business, government and military leaders in Baghdad. That was because of my job with creating vehicle security passes for vehicles within the International Zone. Not only did I get to interact with some of the Iraqi citizens, but I also got to interact with many of the members of the different embassies. Although I had many positive experiences working with each of them, one situation in particular really stands out with me.
One of the PSD (Personal Security Detail) teams that I worked with was from the Korean Embassy. While in high school, college, and in seminary, I have gotten to know many people from different Asian countries. Because of these experiences, both good and bad, I had fairly good idea of what I should do. When they came to the door, I stood up, walked towards them, and then bowed to them. I acknowledged them according to their culture. They hesitated a moment, then returned the bow. We then got down to business. For whatever reason, they had to leave and return. When they came back a few days later, they literately stood at the door and politely told the OIC (Officer in Charge) that they would like to talk with me. They then patiently waited for me to be ready. Because of the way I had shown them respect, they went out of their way to show me respect.
Over the years, I have talked with many people from different countries while they were either visiting or studying in the United States. While many people do try to show respect to them, it is unfortunate that others within the US do not. This happens while Americans have traveled to different countries to visit and while foreigners have visited the US. Sometimes it's because someone just does not have any experience with other cultures and doesn't understand the differences. There are so many different cultures out there that it would be impossible to understand them all. And most foreigners visiting or studying here understand that. But, there is a big difference between not understanding because of no experience, and not even trying.
Each of the three movies have a common theme. Major world events caused two different cultures to have to work together. In each of the movies, each side had their cultural stereotypes of the other. These stereotypes caused a lot of friction and frustration initially. But, during the movie, people on both sides made the attempt to try and understand the others' perspective, while seeking to more clearly explaining their own. It took time, patience, and a lot of work. But, by the end of the movie, their work paved the way for a lot of mutual respect and learning. In working together, they were able to accomplish a lot of awesome things. Something they could not have accomplished separately.
There have been many times where, in trying to interact with someone of another culture, I 'put my foot into my mouth.' I have made mistakes. I have also striven to learn from those mistakes so that I can better interact with people from a different culture. It is not easy. What is normal in some cultures can be offensive to others. These are easy to find. However, will we strive to set aside the things that we find distasteful and annoying and seek common ground? That is something each and every one of us will have to decide when the time comes. For those of us who follow Christ, we are His ambassadors to this world. How shall we live this out?
Friday, September 18, 2015
Sensing God Speaking
References:
- 1 Kings 19:9-13 NAS
I don't know about any of you out there, but growing up I was teased quite a bit. Because I was introverted, have always had a very vivid imagination, didn't care to hang out with big groups of people, and wasn't all that interested in sports, many kids made fun of me. They could not understand why I did not want to be like them. Although it sometimes hurt a lot, I always felt that I needed to be true to who I was, even if I didn't fully understand it.
One of the benefits of being an INFJ is the 'internal compass' that I possess. Since I more often make decisions on 'what feels right' instead of 'facts,' this 'internal compass' features prominently in my decision making process. That is not to say that I don't consider facts, I definitely do. But, my instincts, or the 'internal compass,' is what I used to make a final decision. Usually the facts and my instincts agree. Sometimes, though, they don't.
After I gave my life to Christ in 1994, I slowly realized that God would use my instincts to direct me to do things. It was His way of speaking to me. Almost like a voice at times. Not a voice I could hear, but a 'voice I could just feel.' Sometimes it was direction to speak with someone, sometimes it would be direction to address something in a class, other times it was “just be quiet for now...” Whether I understood it or not, I strove to respond as I felt God directing me.
This 'listening to my instincts' is not an easy thing to do. Especially when one typically 'feels' his environment as he or she is looking at it. It is an on going challenge to discern what I actually feel, what I am gathering from my environment, as well as what I am seeing. On top of that, what people say and/or do doesn't always match up with what I am perceiving. This is particularly frustrating. Since what I am perceiving isn't something that can be measured, many people blow it off. This can make any sensing person wondering if they are perceiving things right.
Because of challenges in seminary and how things are typically done in the military, I started relying on my intuition less and less. Instead I focused more and more on just my other senses, like sight, touch, hearing, etc. For years I did this and did okay. Since I trusted my 'sixth sense' less and less, I became less and less aware of it. However, one thing that I could not turn off was the fact that I could sense how people were feeling. Although I might be ignoring these cues, I still could feel it.
During this time, I couldn't understand why some days would leave me so extremely exhausted. I would work with someone who was extremely upset or frustrated, and then I would feel that way for hours afterward. There were times I was having a really good day, but then I would either have to work with someone who was really upset about something, or just be near him or her for a while. Not always, but many times, I would start feeling that way and just couldn't understand it.
Eventually I left Active Duty and sought a career in the civilian world. Although I did not want to work for the Nebraska Department of Corrections, I eventually did apply and was subsequently hired. It was a difficult job for me, but one I could do. Through out this time, I would prayerfully ask God to help me “walk by the Spirit.” That is, to listen carefully to what God was speaking to my heart/spirit, and then to respond as He directed me. What I didn't realize then, but am better understanding now, is that since I had been pushing aside my instincts, I was making it more difficult to sense what God wanted to tell me.
Over the years, there were times where I paid more attention to God's nudges via my instincts. But, it was more often that I didn't. Since both Corrections and Military Law Enforcement stress facts, that is what I focused on. And I continued to have stressful days that should have been good. But yet, I would come home from work either angry or depressed for no reason that I could think of. Or, I would just feel so emotionally exhausted that I had to rest for hours.
One afternoon, maybe two years ago now, I was driving to work and spending some time in focused prayer. I had learned many years before that I really needed to have this quality time with God to physically, emotionally and spiritually prepare myself for the day ahead. During this particular day, I found myself praying to God, “help me feel Your leading, help me listen to my instincts.” Maybe not the exact working, but that is essentially what I prayed. And, I was a bit surprised by that prayer. But, I decided to take a leap of faith and try to listen to my instincts.
What I experienced over the next several weeks as I prayerfully did this is hard to explain. I know it wasn't all at once. But, over time, I started getting impressions of things around me that may or may not match what I was seeing or hearing. But, as I walked in faith, I slowly started better perceiving things around me. Honestly, it is hard to describe it. I will be walking and feel the sense that I need to go to a certain area. Or, I will be watching what is going on around me and all of a sudden my hearing will focus on what someone a ways away is saying. There are times where I will be talking with an inmate or a staff member and just 'know' whether or not they are being honest with me. This is even if they are biting back sarcasm or feeling hurt. I still don't quite know how or why I know, I just due.
Some days, I sense more of what I should write. Sometimes it is what I should say to a person. Or, I will see a person and quickly discern what mood they are in. Other times I will be looking for someone and instinctively know where to go. Other times, I won't sense much at all. Some days I will sense how people are feeling around me, other times I will feel next to nothing. I really don't understand why that is. Perhaps it's God's way of protecting me from being overwhelmed? Maybe my senses know when they need to be active? I really don't know.
About a week ago, I started researching my personality type. As I did, things started to better make sense. Now I better understand why other peoples' emotions can affect me so much. Or, that I can sense things about my environment is something to expect for my personality. I am learning that it is a rare kind of gift and that I need to treasure it. I know that God has used it to impact the lives of many people around me. Even if it's just knowing 'what to pray for.' It is a strange gift, one that sometimes doesn't make much sense. But yet, I am striving to walk in faith with God, trusting that He will help me learn how to use it better and for His glory.
- 1 Kings 19:9-13 NAS
I don't know about any of you out there, but growing up I was teased quite a bit. Because I was introverted, have always had a very vivid imagination, didn't care to hang out with big groups of people, and wasn't all that interested in sports, many kids made fun of me. They could not understand why I did not want to be like them. Although it sometimes hurt a lot, I always felt that I needed to be true to who I was, even if I didn't fully understand it.
One of the benefits of being an INFJ is the 'internal compass' that I possess. Since I more often make decisions on 'what feels right' instead of 'facts,' this 'internal compass' features prominently in my decision making process. That is not to say that I don't consider facts, I definitely do. But, my instincts, or the 'internal compass,' is what I used to make a final decision. Usually the facts and my instincts agree. Sometimes, though, they don't.
After I gave my life to Christ in 1994, I slowly realized that God would use my instincts to direct me to do things. It was His way of speaking to me. Almost like a voice at times. Not a voice I could hear, but a 'voice I could just feel.' Sometimes it was direction to speak with someone, sometimes it would be direction to address something in a class, other times it was “just be quiet for now...” Whether I understood it or not, I strove to respond as I felt God directing me.
This 'listening to my instincts' is not an easy thing to do. Especially when one typically 'feels' his environment as he or she is looking at it. It is an on going challenge to discern what I actually feel, what I am gathering from my environment, as well as what I am seeing. On top of that, what people say and/or do doesn't always match up with what I am perceiving. This is particularly frustrating. Since what I am perceiving isn't something that can be measured, many people blow it off. This can make any sensing person wondering if they are perceiving things right.
Because of challenges in seminary and how things are typically done in the military, I started relying on my intuition less and less. Instead I focused more and more on just my other senses, like sight, touch, hearing, etc. For years I did this and did okay. Since I trusted my 'sixth sense' less and less, I became less and less aware of it. However, one thing that I could not turn off was the fact that I could sense how people were feeling. Although I might be ignoring these cues, I still could feel it.
During this time, I couldn't understand why some days would leave me so extremely exhausted. I would work with someone who was extremely upset or frustrated, and then I would feel that way for hours afterward. There were times I was having a really good day, but then I would either have to work with someone who was really upset about something, or just be near him or her for a while. Not always, but many times, I would start feeling that way and just couldn't understand it.
Eventually I left Active Duty and sought a career in the civilian world. Although I did not want to work for the Nebraska Department of Corrections, I eventually did apply and was subsequently hired. It was a difficult job for me, but one I could do. Through out this time, I would prayerfully ask God to help me “walk by the Spirit.” That is, to listen carefully to what God was speaking to my heart/spirit, and then to respond as He directed me. What I didn't realize then, but am better understanding now, is that since I had been pushing aside my instincts, I was making it more difficult to sense what God wanted to tell me.
Over the years, there were times where I paid more attention to God's nudges via my instincts. But, it was more often that I didn't. Since both Corrections and Military Law Enforcement stress facts, that is what I focused on. And I continued to have stressful days that should have been good. But yet, I would come home from work either angry or depressed for no reason that I could think of. Or, I would just feel so emotionally exhausted that I had to rest for hours.
One afternoon, maybe two years ago now, I was driving to work and spending some time in focused prayer. I had learned many years before that I really needed to have this quality time with God to physically, emotionally and spiritually prepare myself for the day ahead. During this particular day, I found myself praying to God, “help me feel Your leading, help me listen to my instincts.” Maybe not the exact working, but that is essentially what I prayed. And, I was a bit surprised by that prayer. But, I decided to take a leap of faith and try to listen to my instincts.
What I experienced over the next several weeks as I prayerfully did this is hard to explain. I know it wasn't all at once. But, over time, I started getting impressions of things around me that may or may not match what I was seeing or hearing. But, as I walked in faith, I slowly started better perceiving things around me. Honestly, it is hard to describe it. I will be walking and feel the sense that I need to go to a certain area. Or, I will be watching what is going on around me and all of a sudden my hearing will focus on what someone a ways away is saying. There are times where I will be talking with an inmate or a staff member and just 'know' whether or not they are being honest with me. This is even if they are biting back sarcasm or feeling hurt. I still don't quite know how or why I know, I just due.
Some days, I sense more of what I should write. Sometimes it is what I should say to a person. Or, I will see a person and quickly discern what mood they are in. Other times I will be looking for someone and instinctively know where to go. Other times, I won't sense much at all. Some days I will sense how people are feeling around me, other times I will feel next to nothing. I really don't understand why that is. Perhaps it's God's way of protecting me from being overwhelmed? Maybe my senses know when they need to be active? I really don't know.
About a week ago, I started researching my personality type. As I did, things started to better make sense. Now I better understand why other peoples' emotions can affect me so much. Or, that I can sense things about my environment is something to expect for my personality. I am learning that it is a rare kind of gift and that I need to treasure it. I know that God has used it to impact the lives of many people around me. Even if it's just knowing 'what to pray for.' It is a strange gift, one that sometimes doesn't make much sense. But yet, I am striving to walk in faith with God, trusting that He will help me learn how to use it better and for His glory.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)