I know that it has been a while since I posted an entry here. Things have been very busy for me for the last week or so. But, since I have some down time, I thought that I would write some reflections. And, just so you know, I am writing this on my phone. So, if things seem oddly organized or grammar is poor, that is probably why.
One of my biggest challenges is getting the right balance of personal time for reflecting and recharging, and still getting the socializing that I need. Throw in the responsibilities of being a supervisor and you have quite a balanxing act. There are days where I feel recharged enough that I can face the challengea of life. Other times I feel so drained that anything social is a challenge. And, there are times where I don't have the luxury of recharging, I just have to "suck it up and drive on." So challenging!
Spiritual warfare ia very real. The closer one walks with God and the more you strive to be obedient to Him, the more you should expect spiritual attacks. I have been walking with Christ since January of 1994. You would think that I would not easily get "spiritually ambushed." But, there arw times that I do. But, even when that does happen, my response is typically to return to even more feaverent of prayer.
In the last few weeks, I have been engaged in some very intense spiritual warfare. Between praying for my Chain of Command, the people who persecute the Body of Christ (especially nations that so ao harahly), my family, and several people who arw facing great difficulties, I have received a great deal of "feedback." And not the positive kind.
In fact, a few weeks ago, I couldn't sleep so I did some intense praying. Not too long after I started, I started feel a real heaviness on me. The more I prayed, the worse it got. It got so bad that I started to shake. So, I asked other prayer warriors to pray for me. It seemed that I had really stirred the hornets' nest. And, it worked. Soon after that, I was able to fall back to sleep.
Been enjoying the Bible Study I and another NCO have been doing. I find it so fascinating that the Gospel of John has such simple language, but yet is so deep in the theology! I have joked on several ocassions that I could spend two or maybe even three week on each chapter! They arw just that rich in theology! The dialogue during the studies have been very exciting and informative. I've pointed out a lot of things that others had not noticed before, and others have shared insights that I had not noticed. Such an awesome experience!
I found a very helpful website called "introvertdear.com." I found it about 3 weeks ago and have been reading it regularly ever since. I had ways wondered qhy I reacted to somethings like I have, or why I would feel so utterly drained, even on a good day, when helping others. Things are making more sense now. God hasmade each of us unique. But, certain personalities are more common than others. And, praise God, I have found several INFJ groups on Facebook. It has been so encouraging, talking with others who have had similar experiences.
Life is very challenging. I definitely have been experiencing a lot of stretching in my life. It is both draining and exciting at the same time. I am definitely not the same person I was just a year ago. But, then again, in a year, or even in just a few months, I will be different than I am now. All through out life one should strive to continue to learn and grow as a person. And, as a Christian, one should continously strive to deepen one's walk with Christ.
One other thought before I close this entry. We must always remember that we do not always know what God is doing in our lives and in the lives of those around us. Sometimes God allows us to see glimpses of what He is doing. But, not always. We must walk in faith the God will honor what we do in faith and bring about His perfect will. Just like it takes months or even yeara for a plant to grow, mature, and evwn bare fruit, so it is in our lives. We must patiently wait for Gid to do His will. And, waiting can be so very hard, too. May God help us to do so.
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