Why "Law and Grace"?

There are probably a number of you out there who are wondering, "Where on earth did you get the idea of 'law and grace' for theme of your blog?" That is a good question. It is actually a reflection of who I am as a person and the kind of training that I have gone through over the years. Yes, it is quite a paradox. But, then again, when you read Scripture, God seems to be quite a paradox, too. That is, He is Holy and Righteous and cannot look upon sin. However, God is also loving and forgiving and became a Man, Jesus, the Christ, and took our place on the cross.

Some people train for one kind of job and continue doing that as their career. I am not talking about summer jobs as a kid or one's first job as a teenager. I am talking more towards that of adults. While in college, people will train with a particular field in mind, like accounting, business management, languages, etc. After graduation, they will typically pursue that as their career. Though their work may vary over the years, their particular career field does not vary much. However, that is becoming less and less the case it seems. A lot of people may train to become an elementary school teacher but then they find work on an assembly line and that becomes their career. Or, they may major in business management but then, because of the job market, find work as a cook and that becomes their career. Others might join the military right out of high school and have one profession there. But, after retiring from the military, they get a college or masters degree in something very different and work that for the rest of their lives.

While in college, I gave my life to Christ and, about 6 months later, I felt God calling me to go to seminary and pursue a career in ministry. Although I initially resisted that idea, God won the argument and I began the process of searching for a seminary to attend. I graduated from Centre College in 1996 with a BA in German Studies and started my ministry training at Louisville Presbyterian Theological Seminary (LPTS) that following summer.

During my time there, one of the things that was emphasized to me was the importance of ministering to a person's felt needs. At least, that is where you start ministering. For example, lets say I am ministering to a family whose pregnancy had ended in a stillborn. Due to their understanding of church and faith, they wanted their child baptized prior to being buried. As a Presbyterian, we do not believe in baptizing the dead. However, do I just outright refuse, saying that my faith forbids it, do I go against my conscience, or do I seek another way to minister to their needs? The answer would be the latter… I could either seek out a pastor who does believe in baptizing the dead, or I could sit down with them, explain my theological perspective, and talk with them about ministry and funeral options that would help them gain closure and not violate my theological convictions. This was something that was highly emphasized, the meeting the people where they were at, and then to help them in the direction that they need to go.

Well, after graduating from seminary, my first wife and I ended up moving to Colorado. We lived with her family due do many different factors. While there, I worked for a Christian radio ministry organization in the shipping and receiving department. I have to admit, I was not happy there. I was greatly frustrated that I was working a job that would not enable us to live on our own. I was very frustrated with working a job that felt like a dead-end-job. Even though I knew that I was supporting and enabling a major Christian ministry, I felt under used and totally out of place. I also felt very frustrated with having spent years training to do ministry in a church kind of setting, and not doing anything remotely like that.

So, after about a year, I joined the Army and started my Basic Training in May of 2001. It would be along and difficult journey for me. Partly because my wife, at the time, and I got a divorce. Another part was because I was entering a totally different lifestyle then what I had grown up experiencing. Instead of having lots of freedoms to come and go as I pleased, my life was suddenly very regimented. It was very different for me and took quite a while to get used to. But, adjust I did.

A few years later, after much prayer and considering my options, I felt God directing me to leave Active Duty and pursue a job in Nebraska and live near my parents. For about 6 months, I searched for a job, preferring a ministry job, but considering other options. Finally, though, I applied for a job with the Nebraska Department of Corrections for Custody Staff/Corrections Officer. Although it was a job that I had seen on many occasions, it was one that I had no interest in applying for. Since my unemployment insurance was running out, I did not see much other choice and I applied. Even though the testing and interview process seemed to go poorly (I came down with some sort of 24 hour cold on my way down to the test and interview and it went away as I returned home… Hmmmm….), I was offered a job and I accepted.

My training for the Nebraska Department of Correctional Services seemed to be a lot like that of the Army, of strict rule enforcement. Not the total picture, as I would find out later, but that was my initial impression. At least it was something familiar. But, again I found myself becoming frustrated and angry with God that I was doing anything but ministry. But, this attitude gradually changed as I worked more with other staff and inmates. Although enforcing the rules was necessary, I started finding that ministering to staff and inmates enabled me to better do my job. To minister to their felt needs, I would listen to what their needs or concerns were and find a way to address them that the rules that I worked by would allow. I now incorporate this approach to working with others as much as possible. Over the 8 years that I have worked with the Nebraska Department of Corrections (I had a break in service for over a year, but that is another conversation), I found that many of my co-workers and inmates needed someone to listen to their concerns, to be reminded that God had not forgotten them, that they were still valued as a human being, etc.

I picked 'Law and Grace' because it is a theme that most accurately describes who I am. As I go through life, after my years of training in ministry, Military Law Enforcement, Nebraska Department of Corrections, etc., it has become second nature to deal with issues that I face from both perspectives. Most of the time, my personal preference is a ministerial one. That is, I seek to understand what the problem is and how can I best address it, given the rules that I have to work within. But, there are times where that is not appropriate. When dealing with an out-of-control inmate or suspect, the chances of me being able to minister to them are very slim and I am more likely to rely on my Law Enforcement training. Sometimes, to prevent myself or someone else from being injured or killed, force has to be used to stop someone else. Unfortunately, that is totally natural in a fallen world. But, there are times where, even when I have to enforce laws and regulations, I still strive to show some grace. For example, while I might have to do some corrective counseling or write a misconduct report, I still try to help the person that I am correcting to see both the inappropriate actions as well as what they have done right. It's a challenge, and easier said then done on many occasions.

In reality, we all live in a world where we can deal with things from a 'law' standpoint or from a 'grace' standpoint. Although, if you ask me, it is usually a combination of both, with more of an emphasis on one or the other. Very rarely do I see people dealing with a situation from a purely grace or law perspective. In seeking to address situations from either a 'law' or from a 'grace' perspective at the same time, I find myself better able to deal with most situations effectively. It isn't easy, and sometimes it is more draining to seek to approach situations from both perspectives instead of either one or another. However, I have personally found that, when seek to find a balance between dealing with something with both 'law' and 'grace,' I have more options to choose from. And, many times the person that I am dealing with is more open to what I have to say when I use such an approach. Though it takes a lot more mental energy and time to consider my options, it becomes more of a win-win situation for everyone.

As I continue on my journey looking at life from these two different lenses, I hope to help others learn to do so. Perhaps, when more people can better look at life from these two lenses, there can be more reconciliation and, by God's Grace, a better world around us.